Part Three: Did you check your manuscript for FOCUS?

currently playing on my iPod: Ho Hey by the Lumineers

In THE FIRST FIVE PAGES, Noah Lukeman discusses focus in writing. This is one of my biggies. I am not alone. Writers love to, well, write. We oftentimes get all long-winded in our scenes, traipsing off into scenery details, histories, and *gasp* characters that shouldn’t even appear in the manuscript.

A setting must be clear in your reader’s mind, but you need not give every minute detail of the room where your MC meets his LI. The reader doesn’t need the type of couch, the color of the carpet, the curve of the wall, the sound of the neighbors’ drum set, and the smells of everything and everyone. Be picky. Focus. Choose one corner, where the characters sit. Or mention only the odd bits like the drums and the curving wall. Regardless of what you choose, stick to your decision and don’t blabber on and on outside your chosen focus. It will negatively affect your pacing.

If you’re going to trickle character histories into your story, only include those events that are immediately (or pretty close to it) necessary. Don’t give your reader the life story. Memoirs are a tough sell. Especially if the reader is expecting fast-paced fiction. Include just enough of your characters’ pasts so that your reader will feel sympathetic toward them or understand their motivation.

Focus must also rule in bigger decisions. Do you need that girl who brought your MC to her first class at There’ssomethingfunnygoingonhere High School? Or should you chuck that chick and weave her part into a more important minor character’s role? Remember to step back from your manuscript and recall why you are writing your story. Are all the mentioned characters important? Why? Do you tie their stories up nicely by the end? You can’t leave anyone hanging. Readers will feel unsatisfied and neglected.

But be warned! I thought a character in my current manuscript was superfluous. It turned out that he was pivotal–I just hadn’t realized it myself until two of my critique partners wanted me to give him a pink slip and I fought for him. He existed as the opposite of my MC’s Love Interest, a quiet anti-foil (go with it, people) to the awesomeness of my male lead. Once I put him in his proper spot and focused on his function in the tale, he helped my male lead shine.

Go back and check your manuscript for focus in the basic technical sense considering descriptive scenes and histories. Also get a wider view. Do you need everyone currently running around in that big ole masterpiece? Focus on your theme. Your outline. Your purpose. Good luck!

 

 

One Way the Celts Scared the Bejesus Out of the Romans

currently playing on my iPod: Slow and Steady by Of Monsters and Men (thanks Robin!)

During my latest dive into historical research–my passion for old stuff pops up in everything I write–I discovered an instrument called the carnyx. A bronze instrument 3 meters in length, the carnyx played a special role in Celtic ceremony and welfare.

Celts designed the crazy-looking instrument to sound above the heads of warriors to signal specific movements and to make Romans wet their small clothes.

And let me tell you, it wasn’t the animal head–usually a boar or a serpent complete with a wiggling tongue–that scared the enemy. It was the god-awful sound. All I can think of when I hear it is Wow. The Hound of the Baskervilles and a wooly mammoth had a baby. 

Check it. Here’s your chance to see if you freak out like a retreating Roman. A man named John Kenny travels about playing a historically accurate reproduction.

I’m thinking of snagging one to keep the squirrels off my plum tree. Might work. Might get me arrested. Sounds like the beginning of a fun story.

See? I’ve told you that writing goes hand-in-hand with history.

Part 2: Did you check your manuscript for…specificity?

currently playing on my iPod: Freedom at 21 by Jack White

My last post dipped us into Browne and King’s SELF EDITING FOR FICTION WRITERS. Today we’ll tap some deliciousness from Noah Lukeman’s THE FIRST FIVE PAGES. This book is a keeper, folks. If you haven’t read it, do it. Now. Yesterday.

In the fourth chapter, Lukeman brings up the topic of Specificity. He states that “Specificity is what distinguishes poor from good from brilliant writing. As a writer, you must train your mind to be above all, exacting.”

Such details require serious research and/or experience. But it’s worth the trouble.

In my current project, my MC has some give and take with a conservation association. Rather than saying that the group wants to protect some rare bird, I use the exact name, the Dartford Warbler. With such true details, readers know an educated somebody is leading them through the story. It gives the author clout. The readers relax into the tale and are more apt to fall smiling into the more far-fetched scenes of the book.

Not only does the specificity bring the story to life and make it more believable, it also satisfies readers’ secondary desire to learn. Even when they’re primarily after entertainment, readers want to pick up new info. Through details, the story becomes a full experience.

Writers, if you don’t believe Lukeman, try it. Test it.

And get back to me after you finish today’s to do list. I mean, after take your overweight pug to the vet and pick the kids up from their talent show practice.

Did you check your manuscript for…1 + 1 = 1/2?

currently playing on my iPod: Sprawl II by Arcade Fire

During this post and the following two, I’m going to chat about using some fantabulous books on craft to check your manuscript.

Today we shall dive into Renni Browne and Dave King’s SELF EDITING FOR FICTION WRITERS. This book warns both beginner and experienced writers to watch for what they call the 1 + 1 = 1/2 phenomena.

It’s all about the R word. Repetition. *shudders* If you show your character doing a happy dance and then you mention how pleased he is, you undercut your action with telling. Not a good move. Also, if you have a snazzy, unique action or descriptive phrase alongside a lesser one, you weaken your writing. More simple problems to pick up are repeated dialogue tags, pronouns, and character names.

Example time!

Yucky Version (watch for how I tell the reader the same stuff over and over and over and over…you get it)

“I told you not to tell her!” Meg shouted, her anger rising as her hands became fists.

“Meg, she was crying, for God’s sake. Crying.” Nick shook his head and sat on the bed.

Meg’s temples throbbed. Furious, she pounded her fist on the table. “I can’t believe you! What am I supposed to do now?” 

Meg’s anger wouldn’t allow her to look in Nick’s face. She stared at the ceiling, fuming.

Better Version (Note how I removed some of the pointless repetition as well as unnecessary dialogue tags.)

“I told you not to tell her!” Meg’s hands became fists.

“She was crying, for God’s sake. Crying.” Nick shook his head and sat on the bed.

Meg pounded the table with her fist. “I can’t believe you! What am I supposed to do now?”

So this little snippet isn’t going to win me any Pulitzer prizes, but hopefully it demonstrates Browne and King’s point of 1 + 1 = 1/2.

In the Yucky Version, the writer smacks the reader with Meg’s anger repeatedly. The reader does not need such a smacking nor does said reader enjoy such behavior. Neither does the reader require the constant naming of the characters. They get it. They really do.

Do not underestimate your readers.

So…have you checked your manuscript for the R word? Read SELF EDITING FOR FICTION WRITERS and stop that nasty habit.

Why I Loved THE BOOK OF BLOOD AND SHADOW by Robin Wasserman

currently playing on my iPod: Top Yourself by the Raconteurs

This novel drew me in with its mysterious Latin correspondences and conflicted characters.

The day Nora discovers a long-sought manuscript, a bevy of brainwashed, god-complex maniacs crawl out their hidey holes and begin a war for the ultimate weapon. Knowledge.

When her best friend is murdered and her boyfriend accused of the crime, Nora heads to Prague. She hopes that uncovering the secrets surrounding the manuscript will lead her to the real killer.

THE BOOK OF BLOOD AND SHADOWS is a fast-paced thriller with just enough nerdy references to enthrall the brainiacs and a satisfying dose of romance to please the rest of us.

Lucky Seven

currently playing on my iPod: Love Interruption by Jack White

Well, thank you very much Miss DB Graves.

The fellow writer tagged me in a Lucky Seven and so I’m required to bare my soul, I mean, my writing, to all–no editing permitted. Yikes. I mean, it’s one thing for Sophie Perinot, author of the wildly successful THE SISTER QUEENS, to do this on her blog, but me? Me?

The Lucky Seven is a fun way for writers to connect with other writers, both published and  not-yet-published. The game requires participants to blog a piece of their current WIP.

Without further ado, here are my seven lines, seven lines down on the seventy-seventh page of my WIP.

Miach lived in that air all the time. He existed in grass and leaves and dirt. I couldn’t imagine living without solid flooring beneath my feet, lacking such a basic thing as a blanket or a jug of milk or a lawn chair. His life was so primitive. The idea enthralled me. It was exciting, tickling my stomach like the opening night of the school play back in second grade. But it was also frightening. 

What was Miach doing at that very moment?

Green moss grew over the edge of the first of the front steps. I took one last look at its…

Comment if you so desire. I love suggestions!

Meanwhile, here are the seven lucky bloggers I’ve tagged and the rules of the Lucky Seven for those involved.

BLOGGERS

1. Stephanie Diaz

2. Riley Redgate

3. Writer Cherie

4. C.B. Cole

5. E.F. Jace

6. Joey Francisco

7. Robin Breuer

RULES

1. Go to page 77 of your WIP/MS.

2. Check out line 7.

3. Copy the next 7 lines as written. *slaps hand* No! No editing allowed!

4. Tag 7 other writers so they may continue the tradition.

5. Let those writers know via your choice of social media.

Tag! You’re it!

What Ed Sheeran’s Music and YA Paranormal Books Have In Common

currently playing on my iPod: You Need Me, I Don’t Need You by Ed Sheeran

Okay. I realize that the title of this blog seems a bit of a stretch. But stick with me for a minute.

Ed Sheeran, a fantastic UK musician, opened for Snow Patrol last night at the Ryman. He is known for blending acoustic guitar melodies, beat box techniques, and super-fast lyrics, creating songs that border on hypnotizing. Leading with the familiar guitar riffs, he leads audiences into new musical territory. Much like a YA Paranormal author.

I’m getting there. I swear.

Like Sheeran, a good Paranormal launches from a familiar setting as well. Highschool. An amusement park. A best friend’s backyard. This “real” setting helps some readers make the jump to the fantastical elements of the story such as angels hanging with humans or fairies wearing witty tees and shopping at the local grocer. The leap is more gradual than it is in a straight-up Fantasy. Usually on page one of a Fantasy, the reader lands in an unfamiliar world complete with its own rules, creatures, and laws. YA Paranormal readers often need a little of the familiar acoustic guitar before they can buy into the wilder rhythms of a writers’ imagination.

If you’re writing Paranormal fiction, remember to introduce your story in a relatable setting with a few precise, accurate details and your readers will be much more likely to shiver at your ghosts and swoon at your mythological men.